An open mindset

As I sit in my second coffee shop for more than 4 hours I can’t stop but smile. The holidays have been so chaotic… I’ve been hopping from one family member’s house to another, eating all the good food (which isn’t chaotic, but exciting to my stomach), seeing my sister who’s in town from Vegas!!! and going out of town to see some old friends! As all of this has been happening I haven’t been able to just sit down and have me and God time. Whenever I don’t have that time I get this overwhelming feeling of stress and everything in my life just crumbling down. The week before Christmas I went through one of the hardest times in my life. I drove 30 minutes away from my house, just sobbing and getting everything I had built up out of my system. Fast forward a couple of nights after and the same thing happened. I was at the point where I questioned who I was because I identified myself as Hailey with others, but not just Hailey by herself. Those two nights made me open my eyes. They made me want to just go on an adventure to see where God can push me out of my comfort zone, and build up my character into trying new things! After that week the Holidays came and even though they were chaotic I looked at it as a time to build better relationships with my family, soak up every time I had with my sisters, and just time to not stress about other parts of my life that could be going wrong. Now that New Years is over, I can finally just sit in my little corner at Starbucks catching up on fundraising and my time with God. As I sit here I’m reflecting on the decision I made to go into 2020 with an open mindset, and I can proudly say that the decision I made on one of my worst nights has seriously been one of the best things to happen to me. Just in the past 2 weeks I…hung out with new and old friends, had a much happier mindset each day, I don’t dread working anymore ( I seriously love it now), made more time to spend with my family, and made myself do things that I used to consider as impossible to do by myself. I have turned one of the worst times in my life into something that has made me gain my independence back!! On New Year’s Eve, my church had a praise party which I was so STOKED for, and that night I could feel God’s presence in my heart that he planned to shake my life up to help me regain my focus. His name IS above depression, it IS above loneliness, IT IS above everything I have ever feared or cried about. I have never entered a new year feeling this confident, which makes me SO FRIGGIN’ EXCITED FOR 2020!!! God knows what happens tomorrow, 30 years from now, or even right after you read this. If he knows everything why are you stressing about a situation you can’t control? Take this as a lesson and LIVE out of the normal for you, push yourself out of your comfort zone!!! It is so worth it:)

Until next time friends!

-Hailey 🙂